The Power of Questions in Faith Conversations

Reflections from the final class in our 8-week evangelism series

As we wrapped up our eight-week journey through evangelism and outreach, I found myself both looking backward and forward. Looking back at the commitments we made together. Looking forward to how we’ll continue growing as faithful witnesses. This final class on apologetics might have surprised some of you—not because of what I taught, but because of what I didn’t.

The Journey We’ve Taken Together

Eight weeks ago, I made you three promises:

1. To encourage everyone to participate more in evangelism—whether you were doing a little or a lot
2. To equip you as more faithful workers, sharpening your skills to share your faith naturally
3. To provide tools, resources, and clear next steps for those wanting to go deeper

As we close this series, I hope you’ve experienced growth in each area. But more importantly, I hope you’ve embraced the central truth I’ve tried to communicate: Perfection is not as important as persistence.

If you’re waiting until you become a perfect witness, you’ll wait forever. Instead, persevere constantly, and you’ll improve along the way.

Reframing Apologetics: From Debate to Dialogue

When I mentioned our final topic was apologetics, I saw the mixed reactions. Some eyes lit up—finally, the intellectual ammunition they’d been waiting for! Others shifted uncomfortably, perhaps remembering past arguments that left relationships strained and hearts unchanged.

Let me paint you a picture: Imagine you’re about to debate someone who’s a world-renowned expert, a champion debater with multiple academic awards, their own podcast showcasing their rhetorical skills, and a track record of dismantling opponents’ arguments. How would you feel?

Nervous? Inadequate? Ready to run?

Now let me ask you this: Would it help to remember that Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life”? That God Himself has given testimony concerning His Son through prophecy, Scripture, and the resurrection?

Here’s what changed my approach to apologetics: We’re not trying to win arguments. We’re testifying to truth.

The Burden of Proof Trap

Early in my Christian life, I threw myself into apologetics with enthusiasm. I studied every argument, read every book, engaged in countless online debates. I’d craft what I thought were perfect responses, only to have opponents dismiss them in seconds—sometimes without even reading them fully.

One particular memory stands out. Someone claimed the Bible had been changed over time. Instead of asking them to explain their claim, I immediately launched into a detailed defense, explaining manuscript evidence, textual criticism, and historical transmission. I took on “the monkey”—the burden of proof that wasn’t mine to carry.

Romans 1:18 tells us that people suppress the truth in unrighteousness. When we take on burdens that aren’t ours, we often end up trying to convince someone who’s actively resisting—while they sit back and poke holes in our arguments, or who simply dismiss them saying, “not good enough.”

The Revolutionary Power of Two Questions

In his excellent book Tactics, Greg Koukl introduces what he calls “Columbo”—named after the TV detective who disarmingly used questions to lead conversations. Through years of teaching and refining this approach, Koukl identified two simple questions that can navigate even the most challenging discussions:

Question 1: “What do you mean by that?”

This question serves multiple purposes:

• It ensures you understand their actual position (not what you assume they believe)
• It often reveals that they haven’t thought deeply about their own claims
• It opens genuine dialogue instead of defensive debate

Question 2: “How did you come to that conclusion?”

This follow-up helps you understand:

• Whether their belief has any foundation
• What experiences or sources shaped their thinking
• Where the real obstacles to faith might lie

Koukl calls this the “Roadrunner Tactic”—like when Wile E. Coyote runs off a cliff and doesn’t fall until he looks down. Sometimes people discover they’re standing on nothing but air.

[Read our full review of Greg Koukl’s Tactics here]

A Personal Story: When Less Knowledge Meant More Impact

Here’s something that might shock you: Sometimes knowing less can make you a better witness.

Early in my faith, I became obsessed with learning everything about Roman Catholicism. I studied their theology, memorized responses, prepared for every possible objection. When finally engaging with the Roman Catholics in my life, I was ready for intellectual combat.

You know what happened? Nothing. I overwhelmed them with information, but no real conversation took place. I was so focused on being right that I forgot to be loving. So eager to display my knowledge that I never listened to understand their hearts.

In fact, I also learned that many of the people I spoke with didn’t know they were supposed to believe all the stuff I had studied. I guess they had missed that day of Catechism. I found myself talking about things they didn’t actually believe.

Later, I learned a better way. When someone makes a claim, instead of immediately countering with my prepared arguments, I simply ask: “That’s interesting. What led you to believe that?” The conversations that followed were transformative—not because I had all the answers, but because I was genuinely interested in the person.

Cognitive Dissonance: The Stone in the Shoe

Greg Koukl uses another powerful metaphor: cognitive dissonance is like having a stone in your shoe. It’s uncomfortable. It demands attention. You can’t ignore it forever.

When we ask good questions, we sometimes place a “stone” that the Holy Spirit can use long after our conversation ends. The goal isn’t to create discomfort for its own sake, but to help people recognize when they’re holding contradictory beliefs.

The person who most directly influenced my salvation asked me a simple question that created cognitive dissonance I couldn’t resolve. They probably forgot our conversation within days. I wrestled with it for weeks.

Practical Examples: Questions in Action

Let’s say someone asks: “How can you believe everyone who doesn’t believe in Jesus goes to hell? What about good people who never heard about Him?”

Instead of launching into a theological defense, try:

• “That’s a really important question. What’s your understanding of what Christians believe about this?”
• “It sounds like this really bothers you. What do you think would be fair?”
• “Before I answer, can I ask what you think the purpose of life is?”

These questions often reveal that the real issue isn’t intellectual but emotional—perhaps they’re worried about a loved one, or struggling with the concept of judgment itself.

When to Walk Away

Not every conversation needs to be pursued. Some people ask questions not to understand but to trap. Jesus Himself sometimes refused to answer directly when questions were asked in bad faith.

If you sense a conversation escalating or becoming unproductive, it’s okay to say: “You’ve given me a lot to think about. I need to process this. I hope you’ll think about what I’ve said, too. Can we continue another time?”

The Confidence of Truth-Telling

Here’s what I want you to remember: You don’t need a PhD in philosophy to share your faith effectively. You need:

• A genuine relationship with Jesus
• A heart that loves people
• The humility to say “I don’t know” when you don’t
• These two simple questions from Koukl’s approach

Charles Spurgeon said, “The Word of God is like a lion. You don’t have to defend a lion. All you have to do is let the lion loose, and the lion will defend itself.”

Our job isn’t to be the smartest person in the room. It’s to faithfully point people to the One who is the Truth.

Your Next Steps

As we conclude this series, I challenge you to:

1. Practice these questions in everyday conversations—not just religious ones. Get comfortable with genuine curiosity.
2. Resist the urge to take on burdens of proof that aren’t yours. Let people explain and defend their own claims.
3. Trust the Holy Spirit more than your arguments. He’s been changing hearts long before you learned any apologetic techniques.
4. Remember that persistence beats perfection. Every conversation is practice. Every encounter is an opportunity to grow.

A Final Encouragement

Our need for faithfulness doesn’t end with this class. The world desperately needs authentic witnesses—not perfect debaters, but persistent lovers of God and people.

You might not feel equipped for every conversation. Good. That keeps you dependent on God.

You might not have every answer. Excellent. That makes you a fellow seeker, not a know-it-all.

You might sometimes fail. Welcome to the club. Peter denied Jesus three times and still became fruitful for the kingdom of God.

Keep showing up. Keep asking questions. Keep pointing to Jesus. The same God who used fishermen, tax collectors, and persecutors of the church can certainly use you.

After all, we’re not calling people to believe in our arguments. We’re inviting them to meet the Way, the Truth, and the Life.

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What questions do you still have about sharing your faith? What conversations are you avoiding because you don’t feel equipped? I’d love to hear your thoughts and continue this journey together.